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[Bug 585387] [NEW] Appearance section, p.34

 

Public bug reported:

Rev. 788
Ch. 2, § "Appearance", p. 34 (PDF p. 36)
Type: rewrite suggestion

Manual has:
To further modify the look and feel of your desktop such as the background, fonts, and window theme, you can do so through Appearance Preferences.

The background, fonts, and window theme are better described as aspects
of the look and feel, not the look and feel itself; such as really ought
to be preceded by a comma; and the end does not match the beginning.
"You can do so through [...]" is more appropriate to a sentence
beginning "if you wish to [...]", whereas "to further modify [...]"  is
better partnered with "you can use [...]"

So my suggestion is:
To further modify the look and feel of your desktop, you can change the background, fonts, and window theme. To begin, navigate to System > Preferences > Appearances in the top panel.

This is simpler and "begin" helps to lead into the following sections.

** Affects: ubuntu-manual
     Importance: Undecided
         Status: New

-- 
Appearance section, p.34
https://bugs.launchpad.net/bugs/585387
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Status in Ubuntu Manual: New

Bug description:
Rev. 788
Ch. 2, § "Appearance", p. 34 (PDF p. 36)
Type: rewrite suggestion

Manual has:
To further modify the look and feel of your desktop such as the background, fonts, and window theme, you can do so through Appearance Preferences.

The background, fonts, and window theme are better described as aspects of the look and feel, not the look and feel itself; such as really ought to be preceded by a comma; and the end does not match the beginning. "You can do so through [...]" is more appropriate to a sentence beginning "if you wish to [...]", whereas "to further modify [...]"  is better partnered with "you can use [...]"

So my suggestion is:
To further modify the look and feel of your desktop, you can change the background, fonts, and window theme. To begin, navigate to System > Preferences > Appearances in the top panel.

This is simpler and "begin" helps to lead into the following sections.





Follow ups

References