← Back to team overview

ubuntu-tv team mailing list archive

Re: Just a friendly reminder


My experience is that haters come in a variety of forms:

1) Debbie Downers.  Some people just can't stand to see people happy or
successful, and they will *always* find something wrong with what you
are doing and they will make it sound like the only thing in the world
that matters, and try to convince you that you are a failure because of
it.  Ignore these people, because their complaints are neither fair nor
something that can be addressed.  They don't care about the thing they
are complaining about, they only care about complaining about something.

2) Bigots.  These are people either working on something similar, or
supporting something similar.  Either way, tribalism will make them
reject any difference between your work and theirs as being flawed or
inferior.  Their complaints may be addressable, but they're not
necessarily fair.  There's more than one way to do something, just
because your way is different, doesn't mean it's wrong.  Think about
their criticism, but don't change course if you still think your way has

3) Bullies.  The label may sound juvenile, but so are they.  They don't
really hate you, or what you're doing, they just do it for fun.  The
internet is their playground, and they're going to beat up as many
people as they can, because that's all they're really good at.  Bullies
are harder to ignore than downers, and even if they don't bother you,
they will still bother others in the community, so it affects you
indirectly.  The best thing you can do is call them out, and be extra
nice to the people they were going after.

4) The hurt.  This last group tend to look like haters, sound like
haters, and feel like haters, but they're really not.  Sometimes they've
had bad past experiences with a project, or something you said or did
rubbed them the wrong way.  Sometimes there's something going on
completely unrelated to you, and you just happened to be in the way when
things got to where they couldn't keep it together anymore.  What makes
these people different from the others is that they regret it
afterwards, you just have to be patient enough to let that happen.

You've gotten involved in a very high-visibility project, and on top of
that you've taken a leading role in it.  Unfortunately, this is going to
make a lot more of the above types aware of who you are and what you're
doing.  The flip side of that, is that there are going to be a *lot*
more non-haters who are also aware of who you are and what you're doing,
and you will have their admiration and respect.

Michael Hall

On 11/24/2012 01:49 PM, Joseph Mills wrote:
> Hello Team,
>         Many of you know who I am and that some times I can be trying
> to say the least with communication.  The reason why I am writing to
> this mailing list is because I received some hate mail and also a
> great comment on one of my YouTube videos ("thanks for nothing"). I
> was wondering if any of you have been involved in a project like this
> and received hate mail ? How did you deal with it? I mean besides
> marking it as spam ?
>        Many of you know that I am putting in many many hours into the
> Ubuntu TV project and I might not be the best person but hey at least
> I am doing something. Not to mention that  , I do not get paid by
> canonical or anyone for the work that I am doing, And that I can not
> even afford basic things that are needed in order to develop this.
> Example: keeping the lights on in my house or the internet running ,
> Then there is the matter of food. I mean I am on welfare and still
> just getting by. I do have a part time job and it is "On-call" only.
> Meaning that if I get a call I work that day if not then no work. I
> set up stages for bands also for Broadway shows and anything that is
> in the "show biz" entertainment. But the calls are few and far between
> (up-state New York only gets so much show biz). Of course this takes
> away from the time that I am able to develop Ubuntu TV.  So I do not
> think all of you know all that.  I just wanted to make it clear. That
> I am not running a i7 and I do not have 8 gigs of ram and I can not
> call make -j whatever  so this is going to take me some time. Maybe I
> am in over my head ?  Maybe I feel as though my work is just not good
> enough (as others do Hate-mail, you tube  comments ect ) . Maybe they
> are just trolls and I am taking this to hard. But it is hard not to
> when all you have is 3 pairs of pants and a couple of shirts and no
> cash in your pocket and you are devoting your time to a project.
> So I guess with my money situation and  the amount of time that I am
> taking to *fix unity*(yeah that is right unity would not build and I
> had to fix it (days)) and the hate mail that I keep on getting. I
> guess that it is drawing on me. It could just be me being
> over-sensitive. But at any rate I am starting to feel the effects of
> it. Sorry for the rant. I just don't know what to do. Maybe the hate
> mail is coming from company's that are in the TV business. Who knows,
> What I do know is that I am sick of it and am about to snap. Like lets
> take last night as a example. One of my father-in-laws invited us(me
> and my girlfriend (his daughter)) to go out to eat last night I told
> him that I could not afford it and he gave me 20 usd to come and hang
> out. Well I was at the restaurant  I was asked many times about Ubuntu
> and the TV project and if I had a card. I can not even afford business
> cards sad just straight up sad. So if any of you all have any side
> work or anything like that I could really really really use it. Or
> have any idea's for me I am open eared.
> thanks & with respect ,
> Joseph Mills